Grandad Cat curls his tail and wants to tell a tale to his GrandKits Cats He claws them before him and he meows a catchy tune that he shall tell them a tale
But little Toby he purrs: No, Grand – you're such a bad story-teller cos you only have one tale
(2) cats in a boat
…meow, meow, meow…
nine cats in a boat and one jumps off and there’s none left in the boat in the same instant – anyone going to ask why?
No, this is no conundrum in nuclear physics It’s basic cat life - they were all copycats
…meow, meow, meow…
(3) claw enforcement
Tomcat has his breakfast of Mice Krispies and reads his mewspapers when Molly comes out with a snarl in her purr-ple pajamas
she claws him all over there’s such a caterwauling and Tomcat emerges bewildered: What? Why?
She’s upset that all night her hubby Tomcat called out for Cat Woman in his sleep And what do I do with Tomcat after this Claw Enforcement? thinks Molly Oh, just hiss and make up
(4) Cat Faculty O have you heard? - the standards at the Faculty of HISStory and Catssics are slipping; and its esteem in the public eye declining Have you heard?
Why?
Well, that Faculty’s got too many cheetahs That’s why
(5) Cat Mum's Advice
said one cat to the other at the playground: “My mum always advised me never to climb trees For she did say very wisely: ‘What has bark will bite next’”
(6) Cat Fame
said one cat to the other: “One of these days I’m going to the Flea Circus and then I’ll be real famous cos I’ll steal the whole show!”
(7) Grammar Kitten
Grammar Kitten has learned well its lessons; and of all the marks it loves the comma best for, as Grammar Kitten explains to Ignorant Kitten: “a comma is like us cats: the comma’s got the clause before the pause we’ve got the paws before the claws”
(8) vowel cat
the English tutor sits with Tommy at the table and Sam the cat sits opposite
today they are practicing their vowels
every time the teacher says: “Tommy, give me a word with a vowel or two” Sam the cat interjects: “Meow…meow…meow!”
(9) cat luck
for centuries black cats have been the subject of blame
Is it bad luck if a black cat follows you?
Here’s the answer to settle this mystery once and for all: It all depends, if you’re human or mouse
__________________________________________ (poems written by Raj Arumugam, based on jokes from various sources)
You've got a great seat there, Myst!
ReplyDeleteLooks like a really comfortable evening for everyone.
ReplyDelete9 cat pawems
ReplyDelete(1) a cat's tale
Grandad Cat
curls his tail
and wants to tell a tale
to his GrandKits Cats
He claws them before him
and he meows a catchy tune
that he shall
tell them a tale
But little Toby
he purrs:
No, Grand – you're such a bad story-teller
cos you only have
one tale
(2) cats in a boat
…meow, meow, meow…
nine cats in a boat
and one jumps off
and there’s none left
in the boat in the same instant –
anyone going to ask why?
No, this is no conundrum
in nuclear physics
It’s basic cat life -
they were all copycats
…meow, meow, meow…
(3) claw enforcement
Tomcat has his breakfast
of Mice Krispies
and reads his mewspapers
when Molly comes out with a snarl
in her purr-ple pajamas
she claws him all over
there’s such a caterwauling
and Tomcat emerges bewildered:
What? Why?
She’s upset that all night
her hubby Tomcat
called out for Cat Woman in his sleep
And what do I do with Tomcat
after this Claw Enforcement? thinks Molly
Oh, just hiss and make up
(4) Cat Faculty
O have you heard? -
the standards at the
Faculty of HISStory and Catssics
are slipping;
and its esteem
in the public eye declining
Have you heard?
Why?
Well,
that Faculty’s
got too many cheetahs
That’s why
(5) Cat Mum's Advice
said one cat to the other
at the playground:
“My mum always advised me
never to
climb trees
For she did say
very wisely:
‘What has bark
will bite next’”
(6) Cat Fame
said one cat to the other:
“One of these days I’m going
to the Flea Circus
and then I’ll be real famous
cos I’ll steal the whole show!”
(7) Grammar Kitten
Grammar Kitten has
learned well its lessons;
and of all the marks
it loves the comma best
for, as Grammar Kitten explains
to Ignorant Kitten:
“a comma is like us cats:
the comma’s got the clause before the pause
we’ve got the paws before the claws”
(8) vowel cat
the English tutor
sits with Tommy at the table
and Sam the cat sits opposite
today they are practicing their vowels
every time the teacher
says: “Tommy, give me a word
with a vowel or two”
Sam the cat interjects:
“Meow…meow…meow!”
(9) cat luck
for centuries
black cats have been
the subject of blame
Is it bad luck
if a black cat follows you?
Here’s the answer
to settle this mystery
once and for all:
It all depends, if you’re human or mouse
__________________________________________
(poems written by Raj Arumugam, based on jokes from various sources)